Should You Not Get Married?

There are people who get married without truly understanding its meaning or value, and their marriages fail because failure was inevitable for them. That is a mistaken notion.

Marriage Isn’t Just a Fairytale Love Story

Marriage is not just about a romantic fairytale. Romance is the foundation, but it’s not everything. As life goes on, compromises need to be made because marriage is about building a partnership.

Marriage Is About Forming a Partnership

You are making an ally for life. In every walk of life, you cannot stay alone. You need a partner everywhere. In any religion, whether you believe Adam came first or Eve was sent first, the fact remains: Adam needed Eve.

The Shocking Truth: Why Marriage and Kids Won’t Fix Your Son’s Bad Behaviour

Unrealistic Expectations from Parents

What angers me the most is when parents say—especially the parents of a son—that marriage will fix him.

The Faulty Logic of Responsibility

When the project fails, they suggest having a child, claiming responsibility will set him right.

The Cycle of Unchanged Behaviour

After the first child is born, and the son remains unchanged, they say, “Have another child.” What really happens is that the stubborn son stays the same, but the poor girl brought into the marriage now bears the responsibility for one child, which is your own at 26 or 30 years old, and you expect her to “fix” him.

Burdening the Young Bride

What you couldn’t fix in 25 years, you now expect a terrified young woman—who doesn’t even know how many rooms are in the house—to do.

The Compounding Problem

Then another child is born, and you say this child will fix him. This failed project of yours ruins that girl’s life and drives her into trauma.

Misplaced Responsibility in Counselling

When couples come to me for counselling, I tell them to send their parents instead—I should be counselling the ones who believe that marriage can fix a spoiled son or that a child can set a wayward youth straight.